The Lord Is My Helper

^{Hebrews 13:6} So we can say with confidence,“The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?” ^NLT 

  

 This one is pretty basic. God helps me, no matter what I'm going through. He'll always be there, so when trouble comes, whether it's man, sin, or anything else that might scare me God will be right beside me helping me get through whatever I am going though. 

  Today was actually our first day of premarital counseling. It started at 8am, so I decided to get at the apartment an hour early so we could do our Bible study since he had to work right after counseling. Once I arrive Kevin was still sleeping so I did something stupid. I laid in bed with Kevin. What was I thinking? I knew that was a bad idea, yet I did it anyways. Thankfully we still didn't mess up, Kevin did try to mess up, but I actually held my ground and said no. I know I'm not suppose to be in the apartment at all, so I really messed up going in the apartment in the first place. I can't leave opportunity for sin.

 After counseling Kevin and I went back to the apartment since he had to change before he went to work. Once again we were in the apartment alone together. That was still a no no, but he was on a limited amount of time, we literally didn't have the chance to mess up during that time frame.
 I hung out at his apartment until around 6:30, I knew that he wasn't going to get off until way later and I didn't want us to mess up once he got home so I went ahead and left. Shortly after I left Kevin texted me, and I told him that I had already went back to my house. He seemed disappointed so I offered to come back, he declined, but I told him and was no big deal, then he replied an hour later at 8:20 saying it would be awesome if I came back. At this point I realized me offering to come back was a bad idea in the first place. It was late, it most definitely would look bad if anyone knew where I went. I ended up going back anyways after I asked Mollie if I should. She didn't really tell me whether I should or not because she knew I already had the answer. She did make sure I knew that it looked really bad, that we shouldn't be the apartment alone, and that she already defended me when she shouldn't have. That last part really got to me. I'm trying, please if you don't think I need defended then don't, but don't rub it in my face that I'm a huge failure either.
 On my way there the only thing I could think was how bad of an idea it was for me to go back, finally I decided we wasn't going to be in the apartment together. We would grab a blanket and set it outside and talk for an hour and I would leave. That was exactly what we did. We didn't mess up at all! I know I still shouldn't have gone back if for nothing else how bad it looked, but I did anyways. That isn't going to happen again. I'm not going to leave any opportunity to mess up anymore. Day Fifty Four Won!!!!

                                                                                                                                            66 Days Left!