1 Timothy 1:9 For
God saved us and called us to live a holy life. He did this, not
because we deserved it, but because that was his plan from before the
beginning of time—to show us his grace through Christ Jesus.NLT
Like I briefly talked about in yesterday's blog, God has saved us from hell! In return, he asks that we live a holy life. He didn't save us because of anything we've done, but he saved us because that was his plan since he created this world, so that he can show us his grace through Jesus dying for us.
I just love that thought. Although I fail God's standards each day, he still shows me grace! I definitely don't deserve it, but that's the beauty of grace. Day Forty Two Won!
78 Days Left!
Thursday, July 30, 2015
Wednesday, July 29, 2015
Take Joy In Trials
1 Peter 1:6-9 So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you must endure many trials for a little while. These
trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire
tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than
mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it
will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus
Christ is revealed to the whole world. You
love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him
now, you trust him; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy. The reward for trusting him will be the salvation of your souls.NLT
This is part of the verses that I read Sunday that helped me! I didn't think I had used them for my calender, but I was wrong. Sometimes I love being wrong, because this is now one of my favorite passages.
Days that are hard and full of trials aren't necessarily a bad thing at all. While at the moment they seem bad we just need to endure them and there will be a whole lot of joy once I go to heaven and heard Jesus say "Well done, my good and faithful servant.". Those words will make all of this worth it.
Trials show that my faith is real, that I'm not just pretending to be a Christian, or pretending to have morals. The trials show that I am trying. It wouldn't be much of a trial if I wasn't. It's just a test, as simple as that. God already knows where our hearts are, but he wants to show us where our hearts are. This trial I am going through with Kevin will only make me stronger, if I endure.
The best part of all, is that my be enduring this trial that I am facing in the end it will bring glory and praise to God. The very reason why I here. That is so awesome!
This next part I guess I could have left out, but I like it. Loving someone that we can't see seems crazy to the world, but is it really? It's so easy to love someone that I can see, but to love love someone that no one has ever seen takes a whole lot of faith. The reward of this is salvation! Those who love him will go to heaven, saved from the fiery pits of hell! I can't tell you how amazing it feels to know that I am saved from that! Day Forty One Won!
79 Days Left!
This is part of the verses that I read Sunday that helped me! I didn't think I had used them for my calender, but I was wrong. Sometimes I love being wrong, because this is now one of my favorite passages.
Days that are hard and full of trials aren't necessarily a bad thing at all. While at the moment they seem bad we just need to endure them and there will be a whole lot of joy once I go to heaven and heard Jesus say "Well done, my good and faithful servant.". Those words will make all of this worth it.
Trials show that my faith is real, that I'm not just pretending to be a Christian, or pretending to have morals. The trials show that I am trying. It wouldn't be much of a trial if I wasn't. It's just a test, as simple as that. God already knows where our hearts are, but he wants to show us where our hearts are. This trial I am going through with Kevin will only make me stronger, if I endure.
The best part of all, is that my be enduring this trial that I am facing in the end it will bring glory and praise to God. The very reason why I here. That is so awesome!
This next part I guess I could have left out, but I like it. Loving someone that we can't see seems crazy to the world, but is it really? It's so easy to love someone that I can see, but to love love someone that no one has ever seen takes a whole lot of faith. The reward of this is salvation! Those who love him will go to heaven, saved from the fiery pits of hell! I can't tell you how amazing it feels to know that I am saved from that! Day Forty One Won!
79 Days Left!
Tuesday, July 28, 2015
I Will Never Again Remember Your Sins
Hebrews 10:17 Then he says,“I will never again remember their sins and lawless deeds.NLT
This one is hard for me to wrap by brain around. How can a pure God just forget everything I've done against him. I do not deserve that one bit! He is so amazing! I really wish I would be able to forget everything wrong that others do to me as well. That's something I need to start working on. I'm suppose to be like God, and if he can forget all my sins against him, surely I can forget any wrong doings committed against me. Day Fourty Won!
80 Days Left!
80 Days Left!
Monday, July 27, 2015
Don't Love This World
1 John 2:15-17 Do not love this world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you. For
the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for
everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. These
are not from the Father, but are from this world. And this world is fading away, along with everything that people crave. But anyone who does what pleases God will live forever.NLT
This world is nothing compared to the things of God. Actually they are opposites. This world is sinful, while heaven is pure. We aren't suppose to love this world because it literally only has to ofter empty pleasures. These empty pleasures aren't from God at all, they are of this world which will just fade away. But if I do what pleases God, I will live forever in heaven.
Not loving this world is hard for me. It's so easy to get wrapped up in the empty pleasures. It's easy to look around and see how well God did with everything, and think wow I love this. It's easy to want to follow the world instead of God. We have to stay focused on God though, everything else will just fade away. God will last forever.
Thinking back on my last two years I really feel like I have just wasted them on this world. I haven't done anything for God. I've been to church every single Sunday, but that isn't enough. Throughout my weeks, I've been so focused on Kevin, the wedding, my photography, building my bank account, that somewhere in between all those things I've been forgetting to share the gospel, to get involved with the church. I love this world far to much, yeah I think it's okay to enjoy this world, but it can't be my focus. God needs to be that focus in my life, because everything else will just fade away. Day Thirty Nine Won!
81 Days Left!
This world is nothing compared to the things of God. Actually they are opposites. This world is sinful, while heaven is pure. We aren't suppose to love this world because it literally only has to ofter empty pleasures. These empty pleasures aren't from God at all, they are of this world which will just fade away. But if I do what pleases God, I will live forever in heaven.
Not loving this world is hard for me. It's so easy to get wrapped up in the empty pleasures. It's easy to look around and see how well God did with everything, and think wow I love this. It's easy to want to follow the world instead of God. We have to stay focused on God though, everything else will just fade away. God will last forever.
Thinking back on my last two years I really feel like I have just wasted them on this world. I haven't done anything for God. I've been to church every single Sunday, but that isn't enough. Throughout my weeks, I've been so focused on Kevin, the wedding, my photography, building my bank account, that somewhere in between all those things I've been forgetting to share the gospel, to get involved with the church. I love this world far to much, yeah I think it's okay to enjoy this world, but it can't be my focus. God needs to be that focus in my life, because everything else will just fade away. Day Thirty Nine Won!
81 Days Left!
Sunday, July 26, 2015
Give God My Burdens
Psalms 55:22 Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.NLT
This is something hard to learn. I need to learn to give the things that wear me down to God. God has everything under control, he's going to take care of me. He's not going to allow me to fall. I know I still might mess up, but God does everything he can to help me.
Guess what?!?! We didn't mess up today!!!!! Yes, we didn't come out of the day without any battle scars, but we still won!! We didn't follow the plan as close as we should have, if we did we wouldn't even have battle scars. I did go in his apartment for way longer then I should have, but next week I am really going to focus more and make sure that doesn't happen. I can't give room for the devil anymore. Thank you Jesus for helping us today!!!
I don't remember the exact verse, but it was in 1 Peter and it said stay of a clear mind and have self control. As the battle came that verse just kept sticking into my head and that is what caused me to retreat and go home. Now, while you might be thinking that retreating was a bad idea, it wasn't. I know that I would have lost if I stayed in that war zone, I needed to get out. I'm still fought the battle, just because I retreated doesn't mean I lost or I'm done fighting. It meant I'm smart enough to know I'll "die" in the battle if I don't retreat. Day Thirty Eight Won!!
82 Days Left!
82 Days Left!
Saturday, July 25, 2015
Where Is Your Heart?
Matthew 6:19 “Don’t store up treasures here on earth, where moths eat them and rust destroys them, and where thieves break in and steal. Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.NLT
It's so easy to get caught up into this world, with just everything. There is so much stuff that seems important to us right now, and while these things are good, we can't take it with us. Metal rusts, moths will eat clothes, money will burn, thieves will break in and steal valuables. Nothing lasts, this earth is here for a temporary season. That's why it's important we focus on the things that will last, like sharing the gospel, reading the bible, praying, and well just keeping God at your focus. The things of God will last forever. We need to start focusing on those. Wherever our treasure is, that's where our heart is going to be as well.
I know this verse might seem like it doesn't relate to my situation, but in fact it does. If I keep focusing on things of this world my heart isn't in a good place, it will be impossible for me to get out of this sin. Yet if I start focusing on the things of God rather then the things of this world it will be a whole lot easier to get out of this mess I've created.
Guess what tomorrow is?!?! Sunday!!!!!!!!!! I'm so excited! Although Kevin and I have nothing big planned, I am honestly just excited to see him! It's been a week since I saw him last, and I miss him.
Tomorrow's Plan: After last week I realized that making a rough plan isn't going to do any good if we don't follow it, I know that's a given, but still. We will not be in the apartment at all together. I don't care how hot it is, we'll just have to deal. I'm going to get at his apartment an hour early so we can do our bible studies before church, then we'll go to church, go to Walmart to get some hangers, and run a few other errands, take engagement pictures, then go back to the apartment, eat lunch, make roasting sticks, go to Kevin's parents house, go back to the apartment and I will leave instantly. We normally hug goodbye, but we are going to stop doing that until people are around because there are times we do so good until that last hug. Again this plan isn't fool proof, but as long as we follow the rough idea we'll be okay. Day Thirty Seven Won!
83 Days Left!
Friday, July 24, 2015
I Have Already Won
1 John 4:4 But
you belong to God, my dear children. You have already won a victory
over those people, because the Spirit who lives in you is greater than
the spirit who lives in the world.NLT
This is a nice reminder, I belong to God. That means he is going to take care of me, I am his precious child. I have already won this war. I know right now it feels like I'm losing, but the thing is I'm actually winning because I have God on my side. I can tell you that God is far far greater then anything in this world. He's greater then any person, any item, any sin. He has already won the war for me. Day Thirty Six Won!
84 Days Left!
This is a nice reminder, I belong to God. That means he is going to take care of me, I am his precious child. I have already won this war. I know right now it feels like I'm losing, but the thing is I'm actually winning because I have God on my side. I can tell you that God is far far greater then anything in this world. He's greater then any person, any item, any sin. He has already won the war for me. Day Thirty Six Won!
84 Days Left!
The Battle Begins In The Mind
For the two past week Mollie and I decided we want to start riding our bikes everyday to help get more in fit. This of course isn't an easy thing for me to do since I have to wake up an hour earlier then normal.
Two nights ago, as I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep I was thinking of how I needed to get up at 6:00am in order to ride my bike with Mollie. I just thinking how I didn't want to ride my bike that early, I just wanted to sleep in a little. I fell asleep with the mindset I wasn't going to ride my bike the next morning. Then when the morning came, Mollie tried to wake me up. I told her that I just wanted to go back asleep, so of course she left, I fell back asleep. When I woke up for the rest of the day, I regretted not going on that back ride.
Last night before I went to bed I told myself that I'm going to go, that I can't go back asleep. When morning came, I woke up with a smile on my face because I knew that I was still going to go. I ended up getting the satisfaction of actually waking up early and doing something good for my health.
This got me to thinking some more. The battle really does begin in our minds. If I walk into a war with the mindset I'm going to lose, chances are I will lose. I don't know about you, maybe you're different from me, but I need that positivity to keep me going. I need a mindset centered on Christ to do this. If it's centered on me, and my selfish desires I'm going to lose these battles every time. I will lose the war if I don't get my mindset under control.
07-24-2015
Two nights ago, as I was laying in bed trying to fall asleep I was thinking of how I needed to get up at 6:00am in order to ride my bike with Mollie. I just thinking how I didn't want to ride my bike that early, I just wanted to sleep in a little. I fell asleep with the mindset I wasn't going to ride my bike the next morning. Then when the morning came, Mollie tried to wake me up. I told her that I just wanted to go back asleep, so of course she left, I fell back asleep. When I woke up for the rest of the day, I regretted not going on that back ride.
Last night before I went to bed I told myself that I'm going to go, that I can't go back asleep. When morning came, I woke up with a smile on my face because I knew that I was still going to go. I ended up getting the satisfaction of actually waking up early and doing something good for my health.
This got me to thinking some more. The battle really does begin in our minds. If I walk into a war with the mindset I'm going to lose, chances are I will lose. I don't know about you, maybe you're different from me, but I need that positivity to keep me going. I need a mindset centered on Christ to do this. If it's centered on me, and my selfish desires I'm going to lose these battles every time. I will lose the war if I don't get my mindset under control.
07-24-2015
Thursday, July 23, 2015
Confused
Okay so I am confused on today's verse. I read it like 10 times already and I don't know why I picked it. It doesn't seem to apply to this situation at all. The verse was 1 Corinthians 9:12. I looked at other combinations that I might have gotten confused, but they was a no go either... Day Thirty Five Won!
85 Days Left!
85 Days Left!
Voice of Truth
Last night as I was working this song came on the radio. I've heard this song a million times before, but yesterday as I listened to the song, for the first time ever this song actually applied to me.
As you know I'm waiting for marriage, this is a huge giant in my life. I keep fighting it, but it feels like I only lose. The giant wins every time. That is exactly what the devil wants me to believe, he wants me to think that all hope is lost
and I can't do this because of how many times I've failed before. But Jesus is telling that I can do this, that's why he died for me so that I no longer have
to live in sin, I died to sin the day I became a Christian, because of what Jesus did. That's awesome. I can do this!
As you know I'm waiting for marriage, this is a huge giant in my life. I keep fighting it, but it feels like I only lose. The giant wins every time. That is exactly what the devil wants me to believe, he wants me to think that all hope is lost
and I can't do this because of how many times I've failed before. But Jesus is telling that I can do this, that's why he died for me so that I no longer have
to live in sin, I died to sin the day I became a Christian, because of what Jesus did. That's awesome. I can do this!
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
God Always Knows What's Best.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest. A time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to cry and a time to laugh. A time to grieve and a time to dance. A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to turn away. A time to search and a time to quit searching. A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace.NLT
I know for me, I'm always wanting things now, not later. I don't take into consideration God was a time for everything, his timing is perfect. If I mess his timing up, who knows what the consequences will be. I really need to start being patient with God's timing. Sex outside of marriage is not okay in God's eyes. I have to wait for sex right now, because the timing isn't right. Once I'm married, that's when God timing is for it. One of the reasons I believe God wants us to wait, is so our hearts gets protected. He doesn't want us sleeping around with any random person, or even with someone just because we "love" them because there's no guarantee, once you break up the hurt is going to be far more because you literally gave that person yourself, you became one with that person. That would be a whole lot of hurt. So to avoid that potential hurt I'm going to start trusting God more with his timing on things, although I might want it to happen now, God always knows what's best. Day Thirty Four Won!
86 Days Left!
I know for me, I'm always wanting things now, not later. I don't take into consideration God was a time for everything, his timing is perfect. If I mess his timing up, who knows what the consequences will be. I really need to start being patient with God's timing. Sex outside of marriage is not okay in God's eyes. I have to wait for sex right now, because the timing isn't right. Once I'm married, that's when God timing is for it. One of the reasons I believe God wants us to wait, is so our hearts gets protected. He doesn't want us sleeping around with any random person, or even with someone just because we "love" them because there's no guarantee, once you break up the hurt is going to be far more because you literally gave that person yourself, you became one with that person. That would be a whole lot of hurt. So to avoid that potential hurt I'm going to start trusting God more with his timing on things, although I might want it to happen now, God always knows what's best. Day Thirty Four Won!
86 Days Left!
Tuesday, July 21, 2015
The Lord is My Security
Proverbs 3:23-26 They keep you safe on your way, and your feet will not stumble. You can go to bed without fear; you will lie down and sleep soundly. You need not be afraid of sudden disaster or the destruction that comes upon the wicked, for the Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap.
This verse is such a great reminder. I don't need to fear anything, God will always be there. He is my security, no matter what. When temptation comes, if I rely on him then he will help me and I won't get caught.
Sorry, another short life application. I haven't posted since Saturday and skipped Friday, I really don't have much of a reason except I fill like this isn't working. Kevin isn't really doing the verses anymore, he's only on day 14, and I feel like this isn't working. We are still messing up a lot, and I thought that reading verses would help, but now we're messing up just as much as we were before. I don't know what to do to. I feel like giving up on the 118 Days Of Waiting verses, not the 118 Days in itself, but I know that I still shouldn't give up. I started this so I'm going to finish this, even if I am doing it by myself. Day Thirty Three Won!
87 Days Left!
Saturday, July 18, 2015
God Will Guard Me
2 Thessalonians 3:3 But the Lord is faithful; he will strengthen you and guard you from the evil one.NLT
God will give me strength when I need it most, he will be the barrier from Satan. That is really awesome. I need him to guard me. I'll be honest, I don't really feel like God guards me from Satan, I don't feel any barrier in between Satan and I. The thing is God is faithful, and he will guard me. I just have to meet God halfway, if I enter the war zone unprepared how will I possibly be able not get hit. God is my amour, but if I don't put my amour on I won't be guarded.
Tomorrows Plan: I'm going to go over to Kevin's apartment an hour earlier then normal, so I can cut his hair, once that's done if we have time we'll do a Bible study then go to church. After church we're suppose to go out to lunch with our Sunday school teacher and his wife. After lunch we'll go to Walmart to get some dye then we'll go back to the apartment so I can dye a dress for my bridesmaids, of course Kevin will be waiting outside. Once the dress is finished we'll go over to his parents house, and stay there until after dinner, then we'll go back to his apartment and I will leave instantly. This plan isn't fool proof, but it's better then nothing. We will just need to be careful and make sure that we don't go into his apartment together. Day Thirty Won!
90 Days Left!
God will give me strength when I need it most, he will be the barrier from Satan. That is really awesome. I need him to guard me. I'll be honest, I don't really feel like God guards me from Satan, I don't feel any barrier in between Satan and I. The thing is God is faithful, and he will guard me. I just have to meet God halfway, if I enter the war zone unprepared how will I possibly be able not get hit. God is my amour, but if I don't put my amour on I won't be guarded.
Tomorrows Plan: I'm going to go over to Kevin's apartment an hour earlier then normal, so I can cut his hair, once that's done if we have time we'll do a Bible study then go to church. After church we're suppose to go out to lunch with our Sunday school teacher and his wife. After lunch we'll go to Walmart to get some dye then we'll go back to the apartment so I can dye a dress for my bridesmaids, of course Kevin will be waiting outside. Once the dress is finished we'll go over to his parents house, and stay there until after dinner, then we'll go back to his apartment and I will leave instantly. This plan isn't fool proof, but it's better then nothing. We will just need to be careful and make sure that we don't go into his apartment together. Day Thirty Won!
90 Days Left!
Thursday, July 16, 2015
He Makes Me Brand New
1 john 1:9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.NLT
I love this reminder, although I have messed up a lot, all I need to do is confess my sins to Jesus and he will forgive me, and washes away by sin and makes me brand new.
I noticed that here lately my life application to the verses have been being pretty short. I honestly can't think of much to say to them, but I really think I need to start trying harder with this. I need to give this my all, not just halfway.
Tomorrow's Plan: Originally I thought I would be able to see Kevin tomorrow, but now I'm babysitting. So most likely I won't see him at all, unless he gets off really early. But I already know that's not going to happen so I don't need a plan this time. Day Twenty Eight Won!
92 Days Left!
I love this reminder, although I have messed up a lot, all I need to do is confess my sins to Jesus and he will forgive me, and washes away by sin and makes me brand new.
I noticed that here lately my life application to the verses have been being pretty short. I honestly can't think of much to say to them, but I really think I need to start trying harder with this. I need to give this my all, not just halfway.
Tomorrow's Plan: Originally I thought I would be able to see Kevin tomorrow, but now I'm babysitting. So most likely I won't see him at all, unless he gets off really early. But I already know that's not going to happen so I don't need a plan this time. Day Twenty Eight Won!
92 Days Left!
His Love And Faithfulness Protects Me
Psalms 40:11 Lord, don’t hold back your tender mercies from me. Let your unfailing love and faithfulness always protect me.NLT
I really don't want God to hold back his mercy from me. I deserve hell, yet with God's love and faithfulness I am protected.
I know I'm a day late for this one, not that I forgot or didn't have time, but I was sick and to tired to do anything last night after work. Anyways, I didn't see Kevin so it was an easy battle to be won. Day Twenty Seven Won!
93 Days Left!
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
We Are Dead To Sin
1 Peter 2:24 He personally carried our sins in his body on the cross so that we can be dead to sin and live for what is right. By his wounds you are healed.NLT
Jesus literally carried our sins so that we don't have to sin anymore.
Sin no longer owes us, we are dead to it. We now can live for what we
know is right now. Through Jesus' death, through his wounds all of our
wounds of sin became healed.
I don't know what the original verse was suppose be. I had written down 1 Peter 3:24, the only problem is that 1 Peter 3 only has 22 verses in it. I'm going to guess it is 1
Peter 2:24. It would make sense I accidentally hit the 3 instead of the
2. But this verse will work, I'll just need to let Kevin know when he
catches us that it's different now. Day Twenty Six Won!
94 Days Left!
Monday, July 13, 2015
I Surrender
I remember hearing this song at Church camp. Hearing it back at the age of 16, I knew it had a good meaning, but I also knew for the most part I had already surrendered my white flag. Now at the age of 20, I really see this song relevant in my life. I need surrender this fight to God. I need to quit trying to fight it on my own, because I know that if I try and fight it by myself I will only lose. No more leaving God at the door.
This Is War
Romans 12:9-10 Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.NLT
Here's the thing, while this world tries to justify sex outside of marriage by love, that is actually the opposite. If you love someone you are going to do your best to help them stay on the right path. You are going to try and help them do what is right. Don't just pretend to love someone. Truly love them.
Hate what is wrong. Not the person doing wrong. It's like homosexuality, everyone thinks that us Christians hate gays, we don't. We hate the sin, not the sinner. We need to hold on to what we know is good, and try our hardest to do just that.
If you genuinely love someone you are going to try to honor them. You are going to make sure that whatever you do is going to honor them, and take joy in doing so.
Kevin and I really need to memorize this verse. We need to keep hide it in our hearts that we need to learn to honor the other. This sexual sin we've been in, isn't honoring the other person at all.It's dishonoring us, so we really need to be careful with our actions and our words that we don't cause the other person (even ourselves) to sin.
I know the past two days my blogs have been vague, I didn't explain anything except we lost the battle. I've been waiting until I'm super tired to write the blog, which is a bad idea I know.
Saturday night I had a plan, but I didn't stick with my plan... Once the fireworks were over, and my family was leaving Kevin needed to leave also. I didn't make him because I never have actually been able to tell him to leave. I know it's silly, but I'm afraid he'll think I don't want him to spend anymore time with me. When I do, I just know more time is a bad idea.
Last night I didn't leave when I should have. I knew I needed to leave at 7:00 after we dropped Kevin's little sister off from helping us make candles for the favors. I simply didn't want to leave though, I kept telling Kevin I was going to leave, but I never did. I didn't stick with the plan. Once we no longer have anything planned for us to do, I need to leave. I can't just watch a movie over at Kevin's apartment without anyone else. Last night we were sitting ducks in a war zone.
Last night after Kevin and I messed up we made a plan more or less. It's called How To Win A War. We aren't done with it quite yet, but once we are finished with it I'm going to post it here, but I will start using more war terms on my posts because in reality this is a war. A war between our sinful desires and our spirit. Day Twenty Five Won!
94 Days Left!
Here's the thing, while this world tries to justify sex outside of marriage by love, that is actually the opposite. If you love someone you are going to do your best to help them stay on the right path. You are going to try and help them do what is right. Don't just pretend to love someone. Truly love them.
Hate what is wrong. Not the person doing wrong. It's like homosexuality, everyone thinks that us Christians hate gays, we don't. We hate the sin, not the sinner. We need to hold on to what we know is good, and try our hardest to do just that.
If you genuinely love someone you are going to try to honor them. You are going to make sure that whatever you do is going to honor them, and take joy in doing so.
Kevin and I really need to memorize this verse. We need to keep hide it in our hearts that we need to learn to honor the other. This sexual sin we've been in, isn't honoring the other person at all.It's dishonoring us, so we really need to be careful with our actions and our words that we don't cause the other person (even ourselves) to sin.
I know the past two days my blogs have been vague, I didn't explain anything except we lost the battle. I've been waiting until I'm super tired to write the blog, which is a bad idea I know.
Saturday night I had a plan, but I didn't stick with my plan... Once the fireworks were over, and my family was leaving Kevin needed to leave also. I didn't make him because I never have actually been able to tell him to leave. I know it's silly, but I'm afraid he'll think I don't want him to spend anymore time with me. When I do, I just know more time is a bad idea.
Last night I didn't leave when I should have. I knew I needed to leave at 7:00 after we dropped Kevin's little sister off from helping us make candles for the favors. I simply didn't want to leave though, I kept telling Kevin I was going to leave, but I never did. I didn't stick with the plan. Once we no longer have anything planned for us to do, I need to leave. I can't just watch a movie over at Kevin's apartment without anyone else. Last night we were sitting ducks in a war zone.
Last night after Kevin and I messed up we made a plan more or less. It's called How To Win A War. We aren't done with it quite yet, but once we are finished with it I'm going to post it here, but I will start using more war terms on my posts because in reality this is a war. A war between our sinful desires and our spirit. Day Twenty Five Won!
94 Days Left!
Sunday, July 12, 2015
I May Have Lost The Battle, But That Doesn't Mean I Lost The War
Hebrews 12:1 Wherefore seeing we also
are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside
every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run
with patience the race that is set before us.NLT
I need to get rid of anything that is weighing me down from running this race of faith, especially any sin I have in my life because that only brings me farther from God. I need to run this race with patience. Day Twenty Four Lost.
95 Days Left.
I need to get rid of anything that is weighing me down from running this race of faith, especially any sin I have in my life because that only brings me farther from God. I need to run this race with patience. Day Twenty Four Lost.
95 Days Left.
Focus On Things I Can't See
2 Corinthians 4:16-18 That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are[a] being renewed every day. 17 For
our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they
produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So
we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze
on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be
gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.NLT
Our bodies have been dying since the day we were born, but even though they are dying God is renewing our spirits each day. Although Kevin and I are having this trouble with staying pure, this trouble that we are having is small and won't last very long at all (honestly, even shorter than what the verse is talking about, only three months!), yet something amazing will come out of it. I need to quit focusing on my troubles right here, and start focusing on things that can't be seen. All of this will be gone very soon so I need to focus more on what will last forever.
My plan failed... Honestly, I didn't even try to conquer temptation this time. This is so stupid. I don't feel like the 118 days is working at all... But I'm not going to give up like that verse says. This struggle will be gone soon enough, so I need to keep fighting until I can finally say I have won this war,
I'm going to see Kevin again tomorrow, we do have plans, but I'm to tired to explain them. Day Twenty Three Failed.
96 Days Left.
Our bodies have been dying since the day we were born, but even though they are dying God is renewing our spirits each day. Although Kevin and I are having this trouble with staying pure, this trouble that we are having is small and won't last very long at all (honestly, even shorter than what the verse is talking about, only three months!), yet something amazing will come out of it. I need to quit focusing on my troubles right here, and start focusing on things that can't be seen. All of this will be gone very soon so I need to focus more on what will last forever.
My plan failed... Honestly, I didn't even try to conquer temptation this time. This is so stupid. I don't feel like the 118 days is working at all... But I'm not going to give up like that verse says. This struggle will be gone soon enough, so I need to keep fighting until I can finally say I have won this war,
I'm going to see Kevin again tomorrow, we do have plans, but I'm to tired to explain them. Day Twenty Three Failed.
96 Days Left.
Friday, July 10, 2015
God Prepares Me
Hebrews 13:20-21 Now may the God of peace—who brought up from the dead our Lord Jesus, the great Shepherd of the sheep, and ratified an eternal covenant with his blood— may he equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, every good thing that is pleasing to him. All glory to him forever and ever! Amen.NLT
I like this verse, and yes I know, I say that almost every time, but really every single word the bible says is awesome.... God has gave me everything I need to stay in his will, to stay pure. All I need to do is use what he has given me. Once I do, God will be pleased with me, but still it would only be though the power of Jesus that I will be able to do this... The glory always needs to God. Through every victory of mine, the victory is his.
Well, apparently my figures weren't crossed hard enough. I didn't see Kevin today... It stinks, but I was able to help out a neighbor whose husband just died a few months ago, so that was awesome. I wouldn't have if Kevin came, so while it stinks I'm glad I was able to help with something that doesn't involve me, if you know what I mean.
Tomorrow I still will get to see Kevin though. At my house my family is doing our Fourth of July celebration, so Kevin will come also. That means he'll be here late at night, but as long as I make sure he leaves as soon as the fireworks are done it will be okay, we will be surrounded by family the entire time, so it will be hard to mess up. I'm praying that it works out like it will in my mind right now. Day Twenty Two Completed!
97 Days Left!
Thursday, July 9, 2015
To God All The Glory
Ephesians 3:20-21 Now
all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within
us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. 21 Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.NLT
This is pretty cool. God will use his power to help me become the person me wants us to become. This person he wants me to become will be way way better then I could ever imagine. He will use his power to help me conquer this sin of mine. And, yes, he will get all the glory, not me. I can't do this without him.
I'm not really sure why I added that last verse to this, but it's pretty self-explanatory.
I haven't really wrote about any of the struggles since Kevin and I last messed up, but hat's only because I haven't seen him since then. I think I'll probably see him tomorrow *fingers crossed*, I'm not exactly sure yet. But either way, tomorrow night when I write my blog, I will be able to tell you that I haven't messed up, not even a little bit. I know it will be hard when I see him, especially since it will be a Friday we'll be at my house so we really won't have any plans, we will literally just be hanging out, which almost always gets us into trouble. We will make it through though, and when we do God will get all the glory. Day Twenty One Completed!
98 Days Left!
This is pretty cool. God will use his power to help me become the person me wants us to become. This person he wants me to become will be way way better then I could ever imagine. He will use his power to help me conquer this sin of mine. And, yes, he will get all the glory, not me. I can't do this without him.
I'm not really sure why I added that last verse to this, but it's pretty self-explanatory.
I haven't really wrote about any of the struggles since Kevin and I last messed up, but hat's only because I haven't seen him since then. I think I'll probably see him tomorrow *fingers crossed*, I'm not exactly sure yet. But either way, tomorrow night when I write my blog, I will be able to tell you that I haven't messed up, not even a little bit. I know it will be hard when I see him, especially since it will be a Friday we'll be at my house so we really won't have any plans, we will literally just be hanging out, which almost always gets us into trouble. We will make it through though, and when we do God will get all the glory. Day Twenty One Completed!
98 Days Left!
Wednesday, July 8, 2015
Fear God And Obey His Comands
Ecclesiastes 12:13-14 That’s the whole story. Here now is my final conclusion: Fear God and obey his commands, for this is everyone’s duty. God will judge us for everything we do, including every secret thing, whether good or bad.NLT
Christians, as well as non-Christians has a duty to fear God and obey whatever he says. It's hard sometimes, and for those who aren't Christians could care less about this duty, but it's really important. I need to start obeying what God says more, it's so easy to tune out God's voice, but I can't imagine it makes God very happy when I tune Him out. I know what the bible says, so I need to start sticking with it. Fearing God for me is actually harder then obeying Him though. It's easy just in everyday life to forget that God made everything and He's the one who controls it.
When we hear the word judge we automatically think of it as a negative thing, but really its not. God will judge me for anything I do. He will judge me if I sin, and He will judge me if I conquer that sin. All judging is is someone forming an opinion or conclusion about something. God will judge me for everything I do, that is something to keep mindful. If I'm sinning in secret, it's not so secret, God sees it, and He will judge it. If I'm doing a good deed in secret, it's not so secret, God sees it, and He will judge it. Day Twenty Completed!
99 Days Left!
Christians, as well as non-Christians has a duty to fear God and obey whatever he says. It's hard sometimes, and for those who aren't Christians could care less about this duty, but it's really important. I need to start obeying what God says more, it's so easy to tune out God's voice, but I can't imagine it makes God very happy when I tune Him out. I know what the bible says, so I need to start sticking with it. Fearing God for me is actually harder then obeying Him though. It's easy just in everyday life to forget that God made everything and He's the one who controls it.
When we hear the word judge we automatically think of it as a negative thing, but really its not. God will judge me for anything I do. He will judge me if I sin, and He will judge me if I conquer that sin. All judging is is someone forming an opinion or conclusion about something. God will judge me for everything I do, that is something to keep mindful. If I'm sinning in secret, it's not so secret, God sees it, and He will judge it. If I'm doing a good deed in secret, it's not so secret, God sees it, and He will judge it. Day Twenty Completed!
99 Days Left!
Tuesday, July 7, 2015
I Will Become Stronger Through Him
Isaiah 40:28-31 Have you never heard? Have you never understood? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth. He never grows weak or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.NLT
It's pretty awesome to know that God that God never gives up, or gets discouraged. He's not going to give up on me, although I'm sure I seem impossible at times. He's not going to get discouraged with me either. That is so amazing to know, I feel like he should have given up on me a long time ago. Yet he doesn't. His understanding about things are just incredible, more then I can even imagine.
Just when I feel like giving up, he'll give me power so I can conquer this sin. I will become stronger through him. It doesn't matter how old you are to feel like giving up on something, at one time or another we feel like giving up, like we can't do whatever God has set before us, and yes some times we really will fall, but God will pick us up each and every time.
If I wait on God He will help me become stronger, I will be able to do anything! I will be able to do God's will without becoming discouraged, and the best part of all if I wait on God, I really won't fall. Day Nineteen Completed!
100 Days Left!!
We Can Do This!!!!
Monday, July 6, 2015
Stay Confident
Hebrews 10:35-36 So do not throw away this confident trust in the Lord. Remember the great reward it brings you! Patient
endurance is what you need now, so that you will continue to do God’s
will. Then you will receive all that he has promised.NLT
I have to stay confident that I can conquer this sin. If I lose my confident this battle is the same as lost already. I have to trust God that I will be able to win this war.
When (not if) I have finally conquered this sin, God will reward me greatly. I almost think the great reward he's talking about in this verse is heaven. I need to patiently endure this, if I do, I will be doing God's will. Day Eighteen Completed!
101 Days Left!
I have to stay confident that I can conquer this sin. If I lose my confident this battle is the same as lost already. I have to trust God that I will be able to win this war.
When (not if) I have finally conquered this sin, God will reward me greatly. I almost think the great reward he's talking about in this verse is heaven. I need to patiently endure this, if I do, I will be doing God's will. Day Eighteen Completed!
101 Days Left!
Sunday, July 5, 2015
Fight The Good Fight
1 Timothy 6:12 Fight
the good fight for the true faith. Hold tightly to the eternal life to
which God has called you, which you have declared so well before many
witnesses.NLT
We are called to fight for what we know is right. We are fighting against worldly views and lifestyles. There are a lot of people who try and twist what the bible says into whatever they want it to say, but we know that they are. So we need to fight for whatever God says in His word.
I haven't been fighting for what I know is right. I guess I have been fighting, but I've been losing all the battles I've fought...
We are suppose to keep these morals close into our hearts, and remember God has promised us eternal life. With keeping eternal life in mind, I can't keep messing up. I've told so many people about how I'm "waiting for marriage", I need to live up to that reputation. I haven't been living up to it at all...
I'm sure you aren't surprised when I tell you we've messed up again. It wasn't even "little" like the rest of the times (besides Thursday). We messed up big time today. It all started with not having a plan. I guess I can just learn from this mistake, although I've learned from this mistake many, many times before. But I'm serious this time. Even if I only see Kevin for church and then leave, I will. I'm so tired of messing up. I just need to take this more serious and actually start repenting of this, instead of just trying to repent. The beauty of God's grace is that it is never to late with Him. Day Seventeen Failed.
102 Days Left.
Saturday, July 4, 2015
For I Know The Plans I Have For You
Jeremiah 29:11-13 For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.NLT
Isn't it amazing to know God has plans for each and everyone of us. The plans He has for as are going to be pretty amazing also. I know a lot of times, I only see here and now, but God sees the bigger picture in our lives. He's the one who puts the pieces together.
If we look for God with our whole heart, we're going to find Him. He will reveal Himself to us. We just need to truly seek Him.
I saw Kevin today, and we didn't mess up! Of course, I was working so it would have been pretty hard to mess up, but we still didn't! We actually made a wise choice, and instead of me spending time with him and his family celebrating the Fourth of July, we decided it was better for me just to go home after work so we wouldn't give ourselves the opportunity. I'm hoping if we can keep the opportunity away things will go a lot smoother for us.
Anyways, tomorrow I'm going to see him all day, so I'm going to keep praying God will help us conquer temptation tomorrow. I know this whole 118 Days Of Waiting is really good for us, but we really do need to take this one day at a time. I feel that if I don't I'll be more apt to mess up. Day Sixteen Completed!
103 Days Left!
Isn't it amazing to know God has plans for each and everyone of us. The plans He has for as are going to be pretty amazing also. I know a lot of times, I only see here and now, but God sees the bigger picture in our lives. He's the one who puts the pieces together.
If we look for God with our whole heart, we're going to find Him. He will reveal Himself to us. We just need to truly seek Him.
I saw Kevin today, and we didn't mess up! Of course, I was working so it would have been pretty hard to mess up, but we still didn't! We actually made a wise choice, and instead of me spending time with him and his family celebrating the Fourth of July, we decided it was better for me just to go home after work so we wouldn't give ourselves the opportunity. I'm hoping if we can keep the opportunity away things will go a lot smoother for us.
Anyways, tomorrow I'm going to see him all day, so I'm going to keep praying God will help us conquer temptation tomorrow. I know this whole 118 Days Of Waiting is really good for us, but we really do need to take this one day at a time. I feel that if I don't I'll be more apt to mess up. Day Sixteen Completed!
103 Days Left!
Friday, July 3, 2015
God Really Is Fighting For Me
Exodus 14:13-14 But Moses told the people, “Don’t be afraid. Just stand still and watch the Lord rescue you today. The Egyptians you see today will never be seen again. The Lord himself will fight for you. Just stay calm.NLT
The actual verse of the day was just verse 14, but I read some of the verse context, and realized I should have used verse 13 for this as well. I underlined the original verse for today to clear any confusion.
As you probably guessed, the context of this verse is when Moses freed the Israelites from the Egyptians, right before they crossed the Red Sea. When I read the context of the verse, I thought I shouldn't have used this verse, it written in a completely different circumstance. I didn't think it applied to me any, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I was wrong.
The Israelites were about to face something new, something scary. They was about to leave everything they ever knew for God. They were scared they wasn't gonna make it alive. They seriously were lacking trust in God. I'm not any different from them, although my setting is different, my circumstance is just the same. Here I am trying to escape sin, I feel like there's no way I will make it to my wedding day "alive". I feel like this sin will conquer and destroy me, the same as the Israelites thought the Egyptians was going to conquer and destroy them. Guess what, they were not conquered. They escaped, because God was fighting for them, just as He is fighting for me.
As long as we are doing the will of God, he's going to fight for us. We just need to stay calm and trust Him while He's fighting. He knows what He's doing. God always wins.
I WILL NOT LET SIN CONQUER ME. I WILL LET GOD DO HIS WORK, AND CONQUER SIN FOR ME...
I am sorry for yesterday's negative post. I was just feeling so discouraged, I felt like nothing is working. I really don't understand how I can try so hard and still end up failing. I know I need to give this to God, but I already have. I thought I gave it all to Him. I don't know, maybe I'm just not trying hard enough. Either way I'm going to try and not make any more negative blogs. Being negative only brings me down, so I need to start being positive to encourage myself throughout this entire thing.
Here lately on my days off, it has worked out some way or another where Kevin had it off as well, or at least half of it. So last night, after we had messed up, I asked God to make it where Kevin had to work most of the day so we wouldn't have a chance to mess up. I'm pretty sure God had a good laugh with that prayer. I didn't get to see Kevin at all today, he worked 15 hours. He didn't text me at all until he got home, and went to bed an hour later. There was no way we could have messed up today. God is awesome. It stinks that I didn't get to see him, but with our track record, we would have messed up today. Maybe I'm reading completely into this, but I think God knew we would have messed up, so He didn't give us the opportunity to mess up. That shows me right there that God really is fighting for me... Day Fifteen Completed!
104 Days Left!
The actual verse of the day was just verse 14, but I read some of the verse context, and realized I should have used verse 13 for this as well. I underlined the original verse for today to clear any confusion.
As you probably guessed, the context of this verse is when Moses freed the Israelites from the Egyptians, right before they crossed the Red Sea. When I read the context of the verse, I thought I shouldn't have used this verse, it written in a completely different circumstance. I didn't think it applied to me any, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I was wrong.
The Israelites were about to face something new, something scary. They was about to leave everything they ever knew for God. They were scared they wasn't gonna make it alive. They seriously were lacking trust in God. I'm not any different from them, although my setting is different, my circumstance is just the same. Here I am trying to escape sin, I feel like there's no way I will make it to my wedding day "alive". I feel like this sin will conquer and destroy me, the same as the Israelites thought the Egyptians was going to conquer and destroy them. Guess what, they were not conquered. They escaped, because God was fighting for them, just as He is fighting for me.
As long as we are doing the will of God, he's going to fight for us. We just need to stay calm and trust Him while He's fighting. He knows what He's doing. God always wins.
I WILL NOT LET SIN CONQUER ME. I WILL LET GOD DO HIS WORK, AND CONQUER SIN FOR ME...
I am sorry for yesterday's negative post. I was just feeling so discouraged, I felt like nothing is working. I really don't understand how I can try so hard and still end up failing. I know I need to give this to God, but I already have. I thought I gave it all to Him. I don't know, maybe I'm just not trying hard enough. Either way I'm going to try and not make any more negative blogs. Being negative only brings me down, so I need to start being positive to encourage myself throughout this entire thing.
Here lately on my days off, it has worked out some way or another where Kevin had it off as well, or at least half of it. So last night, after we had messed up, I asked God to make it where Kevin had to work most of the day so we wouldn't have a chance to mess up. I'm pretty sure God had a good laugh with that prayer. I didn't get to see Kevin at all today, he worked 15 hours. He didn't text me at all until he got home, and went to bed an hour later. There was no way we could have messed up today. God is awesome. It stinks that I didn't get to see him, but with our track record, we would have messed up today. Maybe I'm reading completely into this, but I think God knew we would have messed up, so He didn't give us the opportunity to mess up. That shows me right there that God really is fighting for me... Day Fifteen Completed!
104 Days Left!
Well Done, My Good And Faithful Servant
I'm so freakin' stupid. Why can't I do this? I've been trying so hard and putting God at the center of this. Why do I keep messing up? Why can't I just stick with my guns and keep saying no? Why isn't this helping as much as I thought it would? Why am I not strong enough? I don't freakin' know any of these answers, I just know I'm tired of messing up... Yeah last Sunday when I wrote we wouldn't mess up Friday, I was right, maybe I don't know yet, but freakin' Thursday I did mess up... Why am I so stupid?
Sorry, no one likes to hear self pity, but I really just wanted to express how I was feeling, which was very negative and I know I'm suppose to be positive, but it's so hard. I'm trying and trying and trying, but no matter what I mess up. Why the freakin' heck does this keep happening? What am I doing wrong with this whole waiting thing? Apparently everything, because nothing I'm doing is working. Here we go with the self pity/negativity again. Sorry.
Okay, so today's (yesterday's now) verse...
James 1:12 God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.NLT
God is faithful. If I learn to patiently endure this temptation once I'm in heaven I will receive a reward. The crown of life. While I'm not sure what exactly the crown of life is I know it'll be an awesome reward. If I died today I wouldn't receive it for sure. There's no way God would give me a reward for impatiently waiting. Just because I'm waiting for marriage doesn't mean I'm waiting patiently. I really need to start waiting patiently. Honestly, I don't even care about the reward. I just want God to be pleased with me, I want him to be pleased with how I lived my life. I want God to say "Well done, my good and faithful servant"... Day Fourteen Failed.
105 Days Left.
Sorry, no one likes to hear self pity, but I really just wanted to express how I was feeling, which was very negative and I know I'm suppose to be positive, but it's so hard. I'm trying and trying and trying, but no matter what I mess up. Why the freakin' heck does this keep happening? What am I doing wrong with this whole waiting thing? Apparently everything, because nothing I'm doing is working. Here we go with the self pity/negativity again. Sorry.
Okay, so today's (yesterday's now) verse...
James 1:12 God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.NLT
God is faithful. If I learn to patiently endure this temptation once I'm in heaven I will receive a reward. The crown of life. While I'm not sure what exactly the crown of life is I know it'll be an awesome reward. If I died today I wouldn't receive it for sure. There's no way God would give me a reward for impatiently waiting. Just because I'm waiting for marriage doesn't mean I'm waiting patiently. I really need to start waiting patiently. Honestly, I don't even care about the reward. I just want God to be pleased with me, I want him to be pleased with how I lived my life. I want God to say "Well done, my good and faithful servant"... Day Fourteen Failed.
105 Days Left.
Wednesday, July 1, 2015
Something Good Will Come Out Of This
Romans 8:28 And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.NLT
At times this whole waiting for marriage thing seems pointless, it seems like a rule that is just "torture" for us to wait until marriage, but I know that's not what it's meant for at all.
It's like when a farther tells his son not to touch a hot pan of cookies, the son just sees those delicious cookies, but the father knows the son will get burnt trying to grab one of the cookies. The father isn't trying to be mean, he's simply just trying to protect his son from getting hurt. The same way it works with God. We want to have our "cookies" now, but we don't realize God has told us to wait for a reason. God is trying to protect our hearts. Whether we see the good or not, I know for a fact that something good will come out of us waiting. Day Thirteen Completed!
106 Days Left!
At times this whole waiting for marriage thing seems pointless, it seems like a rule that is just "torture" for us to wait until marriage, but I know that's not what it's meant for at all.
It's like when a farther tells his son not to touch a hot pan of cookies, the son just sees those delicious cookies, but the father knows the son will get burnt trying to grab one of the cookies. The father isn't trying to be mean, he's simply just trying to protect his son from getting hurt. The same way it works with God. We want to have our "cookies" now, but we don't realize God has told us to wait for a reason. God is trying to protect our hearts. Whether we see the good or not, I know for a fact that something good will come out of us waiting. Day Thirteen Completed!
106 Days Left!
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