Psalms 31:24 So be strong and courageous, all you who put your hope in the Lord!
Monday, August 17, 2015
Sunday, August 16, 2015
God Is Faithful
1 Corinthians 12-13 If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall. The
temptations in your life are no different from what others experience.
And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than
you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that
you can endure.NLT
It's so easy for me to lose my guard. Everything seems to be going okay, so I give in a little.I'll go in his apartment because I feel like we won't mess up. Shortly after I go in there I realize that I thought I was stronger then I really am, and I fall.
Right now I honestly feel like Kevin and I are the only ones going through this whole waiting thing. But, I know we aren't. There are so many people who have gone through this, so many people that still are. The thing is, no one wants to talk about where we fail.
I love this third part. And God is faithful. That part right there is just so awesome. He is faithful. He's not going to allow the temptation to be anymore then I can handle. He'll show me a way out of it so I can win. Listening to God is another story. I can't count the many freakin' million times I ignored God, the times I didn't want to listen to him. I really gotta start listening...
Well, I decided I'm still going to keep doing this. After being upset for 24 hours over this, I decided that this really is to much for Kevin, I'm asking to much of him. I realized that right now, he's doing all these Bible things for me. Not to grow closer to God, but he's smart enough to know if he doesn't keep up, I'll get upset. I'll be honest though, I've only got upset with the 118 Days Of Waiting thing. I've never got upset because he hasn't read the Bible in a week, that both books we're suppose to be reading lay on floor untouched, that the verse of the week we are suppose to memorize takes him two months. I only got upset because this was something we were suppose to do together, to help us with temptation, but he doesn't understand that part and thinks I'll get upset if he doesn't say caught up.
Needless to say, he's not doing the 118 Days Of Waiting anymore. As far as he knows right now I'm not either, but I am. I started this, and I will finish it with or without him...
Today, we didn't see each other but a few hours and didn't mess up! Yes, he started to (I was dumb and laid in bed with him again), but I didn't let us do anything wrong. I mean, I did let him a little, but not really. Battle wounds, but we still won! One full week winning streak! Day Fifty Nine Won!!!!
61 Days Left!
It's so easy for me to lose my guard. Everything seems to be going okay, so I give in a little.I'll go in his apartment because I feel like we won't mess up. Shortly after I go in there I realize that I thought I was stronger then I really am, and I fall.
Right now I honestly feel like Kevin and I are the only ones going through this whole waiting thing. But, I know we aren't. There are so many people who have gone through this, so many people that still are. The thing is, no one wants to talk about where we fail.
I love this third part. And God is faithful. That part right there is just so awesome. He is faithful. He's not going to allow the temptation to be anymore then I can handle. He'll show me a way out of it so I can win. Listening to God is another story. I can't count the many freakin' million times I ignored God, the times I didn't want to listen to him. I really gotta start listening...
Well, I decided I'm still going to keep doing this. After being upset for 24 hours over this, I decided that this really is to much for Kevin, I'm asking to much of him. I realized that right now, he's doing all these Bible things for me. Not to grow closer to God, but he's smart enough to know if he doesn't keep up, I'll get upset. I'll be honest though, I've only got upset with the 118 Days Of Waiting thing. I've never got upset because he hasn't read the Bible in a week, that both books we're suppose to be reading lay on floor untouched, that the verse of the week we are suppose to memorize takes him two months. I only got upset because this was something we were suppose to do together, to help us with temptation, but he doesn't understand that part and thinks I'll get upset if he doesn't say caught up.
Needless to say, he's not doing the 118 Days Of Waiting anymore. As far as he knows right now I'm not either, but I am. I started this, and I will finish it with or without him...
Today, we didn't see each other but a few hours and didn't mess up! Yes, he started to (I was dumb and laid in bed with him again), but I didn't let us do anything wrong. I mean, I did let him a little, but not really. Battle wounds, but we still won! One full week winning streak! Day Fifty Nine Won!!!!
61 Days Left!
Saturday, August 15, 2015
Sooo, I'm Done. Maybe...
Ephesians 5:11-13 Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them. It is shameful even to talk about the things that ungodly people do in secret. But their evil intentions will be exposed when the light shines on them,NLT
We aren't suppose to do anything that is evil and things darkness, they are worthless. Instead we are suppose to be exposing them. Helping other people turn from those.
This second part was like a wow thing when I read it for the first time, many years ago. Just taking about secret sins are bad, but are hearts are suppose to be pure, with pure thoughts only so it makes sense. All evil intentions will be exposed.
So, I haven't posted in a few days. I've been debating about quitting this whole 118 Days Of Waiting. My original point for this isn't working. Kevin and I were suppose to be reading these verses everyday together, but we aren't. He's so far behind, barely even trying to catch up, which is so discouraging for me. So, if this is my last post don't be surprised. I haven't made up my mind yet, but I'm pretty sure I'll be done. I'll still try and read the verses everyday, but that will be it. Day Fifty Eight Won!!!!
62 Days Left!
We aren't suppose to do anything that is evil and things darkness, they are worthless. Instead we are suppose to be exposing them. Helping other people turn from those.
This second part was like a wow thing when I read it for the first time, many years ago. Just taking about secret sins are bad, but are hearts are suppose to be pure, with pure thoughts only so it makes sense. All evil intentions will be exposed.
So, I haven't posted in a few days. I've been debating about quitting this whole 118 Days Of Waiting. My original point for this isn't working. Kevin and I were suppose to be reading these verses everyday together, but we aren't. He's so far behind, barely even trying to catch up, which is so discouraging for me. So, if this is my last post don't be surprised. I haven't made up my mind yet, but I'm pretty sure I'll be done. I'll still try and read the verses everyday, but that will be it. Day Fifty Eight Won!!!!
62 Days Left!
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
The Lord Is My Helper
Hebrews 13:6 So we can say with confidence,“The Lord is my helper, so I will have no fear. What can mere people do to me?” NLT
This one is pretty basic. God helps me, no matter what I'm going through. He'll always be there, so when trouble comes, whether it's man, sin, or anything else that might scare me God will be right beside me helping me get through whatever I am going though.
Today was actually our first day of premarital counseling. It started at 8am, so I decided to get at the apartment an hour early so we could do our Bible study since he had to work right after counseling. Once I arrive Kevin was still sleeping so I did something stupid. I laid in bed with Kevin. What was I thinking? I knew that was a bad idea, yet I did it anyways. Thankfully we still didn't mess up, Kevin did try to mess up, but I actually held my ground and said no. I know I'm not suppose to be in the apartment at all, so I really messed up going in the apartment in the first place. I can't leave opportunity for sin.
After counseling Kevin and I went back to the apartment since he had to change before he went to work. Once again we were in the apartment alone together. That was still a no no, but he was on a limited amount of time, we literally didn't have the chance to mess up during that time frame.I hung out at his apartment until around 6:30, I knew that he wasn't going to get off until way later and I didn't want us to mess up once he got home so I went ahead and left. Shortly after I left Kevin texted me, and I told him that I had already went back to my house. He seemed disappointed so I offered to come back, he declined, but I told him and was no big deal, then he replied an hour later at 8:20 saying it would be awesome if I came back. At this point I realized me offering to come back was a bad idea in the first place. It was late, it most definitely would look bad if anyone knew where I went. I ended up going back anyways after I asked Mollie if I should. She didn't really tell me whether I should or not because she knew I already had the answer. She did make sure I knew that it looked really bad, that we shouldn't be the apartment alone, and that she already defended me when she shouldn't have. That last part really got to me. I'm trying, please if you don't think I need defended then don't, but don't rub it in my face that I'm a huge failure either.
On my way there the only thing I could think was how bad of an idea it was for me to go back, finally I decided we wasn't going to be in the apartment together. We would grab a blanket and set it outside and talk for an hour and I would leave. That was exactly what we did. We didn't mess up at all! I know I still shouldn't have gone back if for nothing else how bad it looked, but I did anyways. That isn't going to happen again. I'm not going to leave any opportunity to mess up anymore. Day Fifty Four Won!!!!
66 Days Left!
Sunday, August 9, 2015
Come Close To God
James 4:7-8 So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come
close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you
sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and
the world.NLT
Humbling myself is something I really need to focus on. I know that if I don't humble myself before God that will make it impossible to resist the devil. Once I actually learn to resist him, he'll flee from me. I just need to say no to him, once I do it will be easier to say no the next time until he realizes that he's just wasting his time with me.
I need to get closer to God, he is literally the only way I'll be able to do this. I need to get rid of everything that is sinful in my life, so that my heart will be purified. I'm so doubled minded, I want to serve God and still do the things of this world... My loyalty should be to God before this world. I need to start serving God more faithfully. Day Fifty Two Lost
68 Days Left!
68 Days Left!
Saturday, August 8, 2015
Keep Busy
1 Peter 2:20-21 Of
course, you get no credit for being patient if you are beaten for doing
wrong. But if you suffer for doing good and endure it patiently, God is
pleased with you. For God called you to do good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered for you. He is your example, and you must follow in his steps.NLT
God has called us to good no matter what the cost is. Jesus suffered on the cross for us. He is most definitely who we need to be following. When Kevin and I mess up we will get punished in one way or another, and if we patiently endure our punishment there really isn't anything to be proud of. But when we "suffer" for waiting if we patiently get through the "suffering" of waiting God will be pleased with us.
God has called me to do good, it doesn't matter what the cost is. Jesus suffered on that cross for me, he really is a great example that I need to start following more.
Last month I read a verse in the Bible that says that God punishes those he loves when they do wrong, I started to wonder why God wasn't punishing Kevin and I. I know God loves us, so where is our punishment for doing all of this sin? This concerned me so much I started praying that God would make something bad happen to me so that I would know that I was being punished. I know it sounds silly, but even now I wish I could see a punishment.
As I was reading this verse for some reason I think I might have realized by punishment. My punishment is my conscience. Once I mess up I get so upset because I know I disobeyed God, that will literally be the only thing I can think of for hours sometimes. Maybe my punishment is just God giving me my conscience to make me upset that I've messed up. Does that make sense? I know I didn't explain it very well, and I still could be completely wrong, but it's a definitely a thought.
Guess what?! I spent the entire morning with Kevin and we didn't mess up! We made it easy on ourselves and stayed busy. We didn't even give ourselves one chance to mess up! I'm hoping tomorrow we will do the same, I know I made a more detailed plan just to help out.
Tomorrows Plan: I am going to get to Kevin's apartment an hour early so we can do our Bible study before we begin our day, then we'll go to church. Once church is over we'll head over to Kevin's old church to talk with the preacher who is going to marry us since we forgot last week. After talking with him we'll go check out Home Depot and see how much stuff for the invitations will cost, then we'll go to Pay Less to buy a nice pair of shoes for my interview Tuesday, while we're there we will check out shoes for Kevin for the wedding. After that we'll go over to the car wash and wash my car for the interview. Along the way we might stop at a few places to see if they are hiring. After that, all of our errands should be done and we will go straight over to Kevin's parents for the rest of the night. Once we're done with his parents I will leave immediately and we will be able to say we didn't mess up! How's that for a plan? I think it'll work! Day Fifty One Won!!!!
69 Days Left!
God has called us to good no matter what the cost is. Jesus suffered on the cross for us. He is most definitely who we need to be following. When Kevin and I mess up we will get punished in one way or another, and if we patiently endure our punishment there really isn't anything to be proud of. But when we "suffer" for waiting if we patiently get through the "suffering" of waiting God will be pleased with us.
God has called me to do good, it doesn't matter what the cost is. Jesus suffered on that cross for me, he really is a great example that I need to start following more.
Last month I read a verse in the Bible that says that God punishes those he loves when they do wrong, I started to wonder why God wasn't punishing Kevin and I. I know God loves us, so where is our punishment for doing all of this sin? This concerned me so much I started praying that God would make something bad happen to me so that I would know that I was being punished. I know it sounds silly, but even now I wish I could see a punishment.
As I was reading this verse for some reason I think I might have realized by punishment. My punishment is my conscience. Once I mess up I get so upset because I know I disobeyed God, that will literally be the only thing I can think of for hours sometimes. Maybe my punishment is just God giving me my conscience to make me upset that I've messed up. Does that make sense? I know I didn't explain it very well, and I still could be completely wrong, but it's a definitely a thought.
Guess what?! I spent the entire morning with Kevin and we didn't mess up! We made it easy on ourselves and stayed busy. We didn't even give ourselves one chance to mess up! I'm hoping tomorrow we will do the same, I know I made a more detailed plan just to help out.
Tomorrows Plan: I am going to get to Kevin's apartment an hour early so we can do our Bible study before we begin our day, then we'll go to church. Once church is over we'll head over to Kevin's old church to talk with the preacher who is going to marry us since we forgot last week. After talking with him we'll go check out Home Depot and see how much stuff for the invitations will cost, then we'll go to Pay Less to buy a nice pair of shoes for my interview Tuesday, while we're there we will check out shoes for Kevin for the wedding. After that we'll go over to the car wash and wash my car for the interview. Along the way we might stop at a few places to see if they are hiring. After that, all of our errands should be done and we will go straight over to Kevin's parents for the rest of the night. Once we're done with his parents I will leave immediately and we will be able to say we didn't mess up! How's that for a plan? I think it'll work! Day Fifty One Won!!!!
69 Days Left!
Friday, August 7, 2015
Big Fat Victory
Ephesians 5:3-12 But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not become partners with them; for at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true), and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord. Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret.NLT
I know since I haven't really been writing how the verses apply to me here lately I should today, but it's getting late and I need to make sure I'm up early tomorrow, so it will be okay. These verses are pretty self-explanatory anyways.
Even though I worked today I still got to see Kevin! He is so sweet, he came after he got off after work to see me, which was awesome; Then stayed the rest of the night to close with me. After that we just sat outside talking for an hour which was so awesome! I really do have the best guy ever!
The best part about tonight was that we didn't mess up! We could have, but we didn't. At the end we gave side hugs which I'm sure helped a lot from us not messing up. Last Sunday we decided to keep physical contact down to the bare minimum again. I know we did a bad job at that tonight, but we didn't mess up even a little so tonight was definitely a big fat victory! Thank you Jesus! Day Fifty Won!!!!
70 Days Left!
I know since I haven't really been writing how the verses apply to me here lately I should today, but it's getting late and I need to make sure I'm up early tomorrow, so it will be okay. These verses are pretty self-explanatory anyways.
Even though I worked today I still got to see Kevin! He is so sweet, he came after he got off after work to see me, which was awesome; Then stayed the rest of the night to close with me. After that we just sat outside talking for an hour which was so awesome! I really do have the best guy ever!
The best part about tonight was that we didn't mess up! We could have, but we didn't. At the end we gave side hugs which I'm sure helped a lot from us not messing up. Last Sunday we decided to keep physical contact down to the bare minimum again. I know we did a bad job at that tonight, but we didn't mess up even a little so tonight was definitely a big fat victory! Thank you Jesus! Day Fifty Won!!!!
70 Days Left!
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